


The Not So Secret Santa

by Pennygirl612



Category: White Collar
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Gen, Humor, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 17:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17125241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pennygirl612/pseuds/Pennygirl612
Summary: A certain thief/conman breaks into the White Collar Unit to spread a little Christmas cheer. Takes place pre-series.





	The Not So Secret Santa

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own White Collar.
> 
> This is just my way of wishing everyone a Happy Holiday! And if all my readers are nice versus naughty, I might just post a short follow-up for the New Year! :)

The Not So Secret Santa

When Peter arrived at work on Christmas Eve, he could hear a buzz coming from within the office as he stepped off the elevators. Pushing through the glass doors, the first thing Peter noticed was everyone gathered around the Christmas tree. 

Weaving in and out of the crowd, it took Peter a moment to see what the fuss was about and when he did, he stood in awe along with the rest of group. All of the old plastic ornaments on the tree had been replaced with new, handcrafted creations. Scanning the artificial limbs, his eyes were drawn first to the large white bulbs. Each one was a painted portrait of a member of the White Collar Unit; the amount of detail a testament to the time and dedication taken by the artist to perfect each one. 

Next he took in the non-bulb like creations. Peter narrowed his eyes and shook his head in disbelief when he spied what appeared to be tiny versions of the Atlantic Incorporated bond scattered amongst the tree. It couldn’t be, Peter thought. It couldn’t be James Bonds, the thief and conman Peter had been relentlessly chasing for over two years. He wouldn’t…and Peter hung his head and bit back a smile knowing that indeed he would and had! The arrogant little bastard had actually broken into an FBI office to-to-to apparently decorate a tree and spread Christmas cheer!

With eagerness, Peter stepped even closer to get a better look. He took his time examining the other ornaments, quickly recognizing several as miniature representations of pieces believed to have been stolen by James Bonds. Peter easily spotted a Bernini sculpture that had been taken from the Galleria Borghese in Rome, a Picasso from the National Gallery of Art in Washington DC, and a Vermeer from the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam. Eyes widening, Peter recognized a Klimt from the Neue Galerie right here in NYC; only that painting was still very much present in the museum as far as Peter knew. Before he could give that further thought, he was distracted.

“Burke!” 

Peter’s head snapped up at the sound of his name being bellowed out by his boss. There on the second floor landing stood Special Agent in Charge Hughes who clearly did not look happy. Capturing Peter’s attention, Hughes gave him the classic FBI approved two finger point signifying Peter was to come to his office immediately. 

Even though he was anxious to further examine the tree, Peter knew better than to keep his boss waiting especially if he was in a volatile mood. When Peter entered Hughes’ office, his boss was holding up a red stocking with obvious distaste. Again Peter wanted to laugh but knew better than to do so in front of Hughes. Instead he chewed on the inside of his cheek when he saw “Reese” spelled out in gold glitter across the top of the stocking. 

Hughes hit Peter with his best laser beam glare. “Do you know what I found inside the stocking?”

Peter only shook his head but watched with curiosity as Hughes withdrew a typed document with a small red bow stapled to its front. He handed it over to Peter, bow and all. Glancing through the five page double spaced document, Peter quickly determined it was an assessment of the FBI’s security or more accurately a lack of FBI security for the building. James Bonds had provided a thorough report on exactly how he was able to bypass several different security measures to illegally access the federal space. To Peter’s increased amusement, the document even included several diagrams and of course, recommendations for improvements. While maintaining a perfectly neutral expression, Peter carefully laid the document back down on Hughes’ desk.

Still glaring at him, Peter watched as Hughes picked up his desk phone and dialed security. Peter used all his Quantico trained skill to stand motionless in front of his boss and not react while Hughes lit into the person on the other end of the phone ordering whoever was in charge of security to report to his office ASAP. Peter felt grateful he was not going to be the one receiving the scathing lecture that was surely forthcoming. Hughes was a reasonable guy; a good boss really, but he was obviously not taking kindly to the office being broken into by a conman. 

“This is your boy, isn’t it?” Hughes asked gesturing to the stocking. “This and the conference room and the tree?” 

In his haste to come to Hughes’ office, Peter hadn’t noticed anything unusual about the conference room. At his quizzical expression, Hughes jerked his head towards the door giving Peter permission to take a look. And what Peter saw left him stunned. The glass walls had been spray painted different Christmas related themes. One had a giant Frosty the Snowman. Another had elves working at Santa’s work shop. The last one made Peter’s eyes tear up from holding back his laughter. It was a representation of Santa on his sleigh being pulled by all of his reindeers, except some obvious liberties had been taken by the artist. Santa was Hughes and the faces of the reindeer had been replaced by members of the White Collar Unit including Peter as Rudolph. 

Joining him outside the conference room, Hughes asked, “Is it him? Is this your James Bonds?”

Not trusting himself to speak, Peter merely nodded. Peter must not have been completely successful in hiding his amusement from his boss as Hughes snapped, “Do you find something amusing, Agent Burke?”

Peter averted his eyes as he shook his head, “No, sir.”

“Humph,” Hughes grunted. “Arrogant little bastard, isn’t he?” Peter wisely remained silent, but was surprised when his boss’s tone softened slightly. “Talented, but arrogant!” Hughes sighed, “Are you even remotely close to identifying this kid?”

Peter hedged his answer thinking of the Klimt ornament hanging on the Christmas tree, “I have a promising lead, sir.”

“A promising lead,” Hughes repeated. The look Hughes gave him let Peter know his boss was more than a little skeptical. After a moment, he gave Peter a sinister smile, “Might I suggest you arrest his little ass soon or next Christmas you’ll be finding yourself working at The Cave!” 

Peter was saved from responding when Hughes spotted the Security Chief heading up the stairs. With great haste, Peter took the opportunity to escape his boss and slip into his own office. Closing the door behind him, Peter froze, staring at the hanging red stocking. It was the same as the one Hughes had received but with “Peter” spelled out in green glitter. 

Taking down the stocking, he walked over to his desk and turned it upside down to allow its content to spread out. The stocking had mostly been filled with solid green candy canes which Peter took little amusement from knowing it was James Bonds way of reminding him of the green sucker he had handed Peter outside the bank the day he had cashed in the counterfeit Atlantic Incorporate bond. 

But scattered amongst the candy were two other items. One was a small sculpture identical in every way to Rodin’s The Thinker. The other was a Christmas themed postcard. The flip side of the card simply said “Happy Holidays from Frank Abagnale”. Peter wryly shook his head. The message was clear: catch me if you can. 

Just then, Peter’s phone went off. Glancing at the screen, he saw a new text from Sara Ellis, the Sterling Bosch investigator. The text included a picture of a white ornament with a representation of Rafael’s St. George and the Dragon painted on it. The same painting Sara was being paid to reclaim from its thief. Since they had no proof the painting had been stolen by James Bonds, Peter thought sending the ornament to Sara was a bold but unnecessarily risky move. From Peter’s limited time working with Sara, she was not one to take kindly to taunting. It reinforced to Peter just how young and impulsive James Bonds was. Eventually, Peter knew it would be his downfall. 

Thinking of the tree, the conference room, the stockings and now Sara’s ornament, it all proved to be too much for Peter as he finally gave in and started laughing. Once he was able to catch his breath, he dialed his wife’s number.

“El, you won’t believe what James Bonds has done now…”


End file.
